


The Road to Forgetting

by forever_writing



Category: Daredevil (TV)
Genre: AU, F/M, Love, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Slow Burn, Survivor Guilt, kastle - Freeform, might change rating but i'm not really sure yet, single parent, we'll see how it goes
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-04-22
Updated: 2016-07-07
Packaged: 2018-06-03 17:18:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,336
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6619501
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/forever_writing/pseuds/forever_writing
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>All Karen Page wants to do is forget. Forget who she is, where she came from, and what she's done. All she has to do now is follow the steps to get there. Forgetting ends up coming unexpectedly in the form of Hell's Kitchen, a new job in a field she's never been in, an old friend, two children, and Frank Castle, a man who needs just as much help as she does.</p><p>: An AU in which Frank Castle is a single father struggling not only with PTSD, but also raising two children on his own. And Karen Page still somehow manages to have more problems than him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Step One

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first story on Archive and I would love to get your guy's feedback! Definitely an AU for those of you that are into that. Please leave a comment if you enjoy!  
> (of course I don't own the characters so all rights to Marvel. Go Marvel.)

Karen balanced a cardboard box filled with some of her clothes between the wall and her body as she somehow managed to slide the key into the lock and turn. She almost tripped over the slight incline of the doorway as she looked around the empty apartment. It was a decent size, definitely enough to fit her and her minimal personal items. She didn’t even need a moving van, just five boxes and her used car. Karen set the box down and walked around the single bedroom apartment.

Karen was new to Hell’s Kitchen, and excited to start over with her life. She just wanted to leave Vermont behind. She was putting herself on a step by step plan on what she called, "The Road to Forgetting".

The first step came in the form of an old high school friend, Foggy Nelson. Foggy had contacted Karen when he had first heard about what happened. They hadn’t talked in years, but Foggy had felt some sort of responsibility towards making it known that he would always be there for her if she ever needed anything, and right now she needed him. When he had first mentioned that he was opening a small law firm with a college friend named Matt, she had immediately asked if they needed help. She could be a secretary, she could look for cases for them, maybe even try to help them with a couple, she would even stoop so low to just be the girl that got them coffee in the morning. She promised she would do research, she’s a good team player and she works hard. She was almost begging him to employ her. Anything to give her a better excuse to leave Vermont behind.

But Foggy didn’t need her to beg. He meant it when he said he would be there to help her.

She almost didn’t believe him when he just simply said, “You’re hired.” There was really nothing else to it with him. She kept questioning him, pointing out that he hadn’t seen her since high school. He responded with, “If I can’t hire who I want, then what’s the point in running my own business?”

She started looking for an apartment the moment she hung up the phone.

She had a bit of money saved up, just enough to make the trip to the city and live comfortably for about 5 months in the cheap apartment building she had chosen. It definitely wasn’t in a good area, but when trying to pick out a place to live in a place called Hell’s Kitchen, she assumed that there probably aren’t a lot of nice areas that come cheap. She bought her first can of pepper spray that night.

When she told her parents, they didn’t have much of a reaction. They just kind of told her to be safe and keep in touch. It wasn’t like Karen was expecting much else from them anyways. She knew that it would just be easier for all of them if she wasn’t around much anymore. Her mom hadn’t so much as made full eye contact with her in the past month.

Foggy had called her on a Monday. It was now Saturday, and she was inspecting the twin sized mattress that had a thin layer of dust on it. She slowly ran her hand, brushing some of it off. The owner of the apartments told her that no one had lived in this room for a while due to the fact that there had been an increase in crime rate in the area. Minor details to Karen. All she was looking for was a place that wasn’t Vermont.

Karen pulled herself out of the slight trance she was in and made the few trips back and forth from the car in order to bring up the rest of her boxes. It took her a little longer than it should have because the elevator was currently being worked on, so she had to climb five stories of stairs each trip.

On the third trip up she noticed that one of the doors that was across the hall and slightly farther down was cracked open just enough for a little girl with blonde hair to peak out at her. Karen was polite and smiled at the little girl over the top of the large box in her hands. The girl smiled before turning and disappearing into her home, but still leaving the door open. Karen was still smiling as she walked back downstairs to get the next box.

The fourth trip up welcomed her with not only the little girl having returned to the slightly open door, but now a little boy that was about a foot shorter and a couple years younger trying to squeeze his way around his sister to get a good look at Karen. Karen laughed a little to herself and waved as much as she could with the box in her hand. The little boy stuck his arm out the door and waved back. They both ran back into the house giggling this time.

The fifth trip up showed that the kids were back at the doorway, but this time the little girl quietly snuck into the hallway when Karen was almost halfway to her door.

She looked to be about eight years old, but she was tall and thin. In fact, she almost reminded Karen of what she used to look like at the age, the young girl having blonde hair that was a bit darker than hers.

She looked up at Karen for a moment with big blue eyes until Karen stopped at her doorway. “Do you live here now?” She asked.

“I do,” Karen smiled.

“Well I live across the hall,” the girl spoke confidently. “Sometimes my brother and I like to play in the hallway and my Daddy says we have to make sure all of the neighbors are okay with it first. Are you okay with it?”

Karen laughed a little at her straight forwardness. “That’s fine with me.”

“Alright, good. My name is Lisa Castle, and that’s my brother Frank, but we just call him Junior. He doesn’t talk a lot so I do it for him sometimes.” She turned back and pointed the little boy who was still watching from the doorway. She could see him better now that the door was open a little more. He was shorter, with dark hair, wearing spider man pajamas, and he looked like he was only about five. He waved at Karen again. Karen waved back even though she was still carrying a box and smiled.

“Well it’s nice to meet you both, my name is Karen.”

“What’s your last name?” Lisa asked.

“Page.”

“Are you married?” Lisa questioned as though she were asking about the weather.

Karen was taken back for a moment, not expecting to be asked that, “Um, no. No I don’t have a husband. Why do you ask?”

Lisa smiled. “Alright, Junior and I will call you Ms. Page when we see you. Daddy says that it’s polite to call a woman either Ms. or Mrs. depending if she’s married or not.”

“Oh, okay. You’re welcome to call me Karen if you’d like. I don’t mind,” Karen explained.

“That’s alright Ms. Page. Junior and I are used to it,” she bounced on her toes a little. “Where did you live before you came here?”

Karen was quickly trying to think of some sort of lie. Why her first thought was to lie to an eight year old, she doesn’t know. She just didn’t want to talk about Vermont at the moment. She wasn’t able to come up with anything good before she heard a voice from what seemed to be the inside of the children's apartment. “Hey! What are you two doing out there?”

She saw Lisa’s head quickly turn to look at her brother who was now looking behind him at whoever had just spoken from inside the house. Instead of giving the person an answer he simply opened the door a little wider and pointed out at Karen.

Karen stood, still somehow holding a box in her hands this whole time, and waited to see the source of the voice.

A hand gripped the edge of the door and pulled it all the way open, revealing a very large man with a very nice face. Karen had to mentally tell herself not to oggle too long, but she allowed herself to notice the basics. He was probably only an inch taller than her, but the actual size of him made it seem like he was huge compared to her. He had on a black t-shirt, dark blue jeans, and white socks. She managed to notice the dog tags hanging around his neck and put together from the buzzcut and biceps that he was a military man.

He looked at Karen for a moment until Lisa quickly spoke up, “Daddy, this is Ms. Page. She lives here now and she already said that it was okay if Junior and I play in the hallway.”

He looked between Lisa and Junior and then back up at Karen, “They get a little loud sometimes. Throw a ball around. You might want to wait before you agree.”

Karen smiled, “It’s alright, really. I won’t mind the noise.”

He shrugged, “Hope you’re right. Lisa won’t let you take it back once you’ve said yes already.” Lisa smiled up widely at Karen.

“Okay now,” the man said to the children. “Let's get inside and let Ms. Page get herself settled in.”

Lisa skipped back into the room after saying a quick bye to Karen. Junior waved his goodbye and Karen waved back as best she could before he turned to follow his sister. The man walked out into the hallway and shut the door behind him. “I’m sorry about that ma’am. I hope she didn’t give you too much trouble.”

Karen laughed, “Trust me, she’s fine. She’s very cute.”

“That’s what she want’s you to think,” he smiled. “My name is Frank Castle, I’m their father.”

“It’s nice to meet you Frank. My name is Karen and I would shake your hand, but both of mine are kind of full at the moment,” she joked.

“Do you need a hand?” He asked quickly. “Are there any other boxes?”

“Hold on, one moment.” Karen took a few steps into her apartment and set the box down in the middle of the floor, her arms feeling slightly like putty from holding it up so long. She walked back into the hall and up to Frank with her hand out. He reached out and shook it. “That was the last box, but thank you for offering.”

“Well, if you ever need help or anything like that, I’m right across the hall. I know that the rooms here aren't in the best shape and yours hasn’t been used in a while, but my dad was a carpenter so I picked up a few things here and there. Don’t hesitate to just come over and ask. I can't promise I'll be able to fix it, but I have no problem trying.”

“Thank you. I appreciate that.” Karen was relieved she wouldn’t have to try and fix everything herself like she had planned on doing if there were any problems in the apartment.

“I should get back in there,” Frank behind him at his door. “The two of them set off tornado's when they’re left by themselves too long.”

“Of course,” Karen smiled. “It was nice to meet you Frank.”

“You too, Ms. Page.” He opened his door and started walking back in. “Have a nice night ma’am.”

“You too,” Karen waved slightly as she turned and went back into her apartment, closing the door behind her.

She locked the door and closed the dead bolt latch at the top. She turned and looked around the still empty apartment and felt the smile slowly fade from her face. It was so quiet. She realized she had liked the small interaction in the hallway much more than she should have. Those people, they don’t know her. They don’t know what she did. They’re not like her neighbors in Vermont that had only looked at her with pity or disgust. They’re not like her mother that doesn’t look at her at all. They’re a normal happy family that’s probably all sitting on the couch together. Two children nestled between Frank and whoever is wife is. Just what a family should be.

Karen slid down the wall and let herself cry.


	2. Bloody Noses

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks so much for everyone's comments on the first chapter! I'm pretty excited about this story, so I hope you guys are too. I mean, who doesn't want to see Frank Castle being a loving dad? Anyways, I'd love to hear what you guys think and if you want to see more. Thanks!  
> (All rights to Marvel. Go Marvel.)

Karen spent Sunday organizing her things as best she could. She hung all of her clothes, put sheets on the bed, and put all of the food in the cupboards. She spent a good three hours trying to figure out how to hook up cable. It probably would have taken a fraction of that time if she had just gone across the hall and asked Frank for help, but after last night, she just wasn’t feeling up to socializing. She just wanted to be able to do things for herself and not have to worry about needing someone else. 

She considered herself lucky that the room came basically furnished. It was definitely in the most minimal sense, only a couch in the living room area, a table and chairs in the kitchen, a couple desks and such scattered around, and a bedside table in her room. She was just glad she didn’t have to go out and find those things for herself.

She thought about taking a walk around the city, trying to get her bearings straight, but the more paranoid side of her mind told her she should just stay in. Instead she watched the news on her small TV, and sipped on some coffee. There was a special that talked about the aftermath of the Battle of New York. It took a look at the effects that it was leaving on residents less than a year after its occurrence. Karen had to turn the TV of when they started asking children what it was like to lose their family members.   
She decided she should prepare herself for work the next day.

Karen spent an hour trying to find the right outfit to wear. It wasn’t only her first day at a new job, in a new setting, doing a job she had never done before, but she was also seeing an old friend that was already doing so much to help her. She didn’t want him to see just how much she had fallen apart since they had last seen each other. 

She thought about television shows. What do secretaries wear on TV? She settled with the typical black pencil skirt that went just past her knees, a white blouse with blue flowers on in, and black flats. It looked light, pretty, professional. She was happy enough with it.

She stared at herself in the mirror, shifting the blouse slowly in her hands. She let her eyes shift up so that she was looking at her face. She didn’t like to do that much anymore. Since she hadn’t gone out that day, there had been no need to put any makeup on. Now she couldn’t help but notice how stringy her blonde hair was. It use to look like silk when she spent more time taking care of it. She would put it in a bun tomorrow. Her skin held a bit tighter on her face. She hadn’t been hungry after everything had happened. Frankly, she barely even left her room back at home. Karen looked into her own eyes in the mirror and felt an overwhelming sense that she didn’t know the person looking back at her. The dark circles, strong frown, lack of expression, they were all new to her. Something that she knew she was going to have to start getting used to seeing. Something that she desperately didn’t want to have to get used to. 

She went to bed early that night after sitting in the shower for 30 minutes longer than she should have. There was no motivation to try to kill time anymore, and sleep just sounded too good to her.

She couldn’t tell how long she tossed and turned. The sounds outside her window would take her a long time to get used to. Growing up, she had always lived in such a quiet part of Vermont. The horns, sirens, yelling, and even the occasional gunshot were all sounds that caused sleep to evade her for longer than she wanted. But, eventually, everyone always falls asleep. 

The next day, she woke early to her alarm and got dressed in the clothes that she had already laid out for herself. There was giggling coming from the hallway while she applied her makeup. A small smile raised on Karen’s face as she heard a ball hit her door. She could hear the two children running back and forth. 

Karen shoved all of the things she thought she might need into her purse, making sure her pepper spray was at the top. It would be useless to her if it wasn’t within reach.

She purposely opened her door slowly, as to make sure she wasn’t suddenly attacked by a ball flying towards her door. When she was able to peek her head out she could see Lisa run past the door after her brother, trying to get good aim before she tried to throw the ball at her brother. 

Karen had turned her back on them for a moment to close and lock her door behind her when she heard the ball make contact.

Karen Page has never been known for having maternal instincts, but it didn’t take a genius to realize by the abrupt stop in giggling that something had gone wrong. She quickly turned to look at the two children only to find that Lisa not only had very good aim, but she also had a very strong arm. Junior was now sitting on the floor holding onto his nose as Lisa crouched down in front of him trying to convince him not to cry.

It didn’t work.

The minute Junior saw the blood on his hand after pulling it away from his nose, his eyes almost instantly filled with tears as he helplessly looked at Karen. It took a minute for the gears in her head to start working, but she finally set her bag down and walked over to them.

“Is your father home?” She directed to Lisa as she crouched down in front of Junior.

“Yeah, he was in the shower when we came out here to play.” Her tone of voice sounded nothing like the excited little girl she had talked with yesterday. Lisa knew she would be in trouble when her dad found out. She always gets in trouble when Junior cries.

“How about you go inside and get your dad and I’ll stay out here with Junior,” she instructed. 

Lisa nodded slowly, not really wanting to go get her father but getting up to do it anyways. Karen sat down fully in front of Junior and smiled knowingly at him. “Big sisters stink sometimes, huh?” She asked jokingly.

Junior looked up at her with a pouty face and tear filled eyes and nodded his head as if he couldn’t agree more.

Karen reached out and gently tried to take Junior’s hand off of his face. “Don’t worry, I’m not going to hurt you. You can’t squeeze your nose like that or you’ll hurt it more. Let me take a look.”

Junior took a minute to actually let Karen take his hand away, but when he did she quickly had to stick her hand under his face to stop blood from dripping onto his pajamas. Karen could tell it wasn’t broken, probably just a cut on the inside of his nose.

There was a moment where she almost allowed herself to get grossed out by the blood that was now dripping into her, but then she realized that Junior’s blood covered hand was still holding tightly to hers and she couldn’t find it in her to really care at that point. “It’s going to be fine sweetie, nothing's broken. There’s no need to cry anymore. We’ll just wait here until your dad comes out and then he can wash you up. Sound good?”

Junior nodded slightly and used his free hand to wipe away some of his tears, only to start crying once again the moment he saw his father walk into the hallway.

Karen turned just as Frank opened the apartment door, catching a much too quick glance at him pulling the rest of his shirt over his head. It was clear that he had only just gotten out of the shower and ran out to the hallway to come check on his son. Lisa stood shyly in the doorway.

“Oh, bud,” Frank said as he scooped up his son, who was now crying louder as he wrapped his small arms around his dad's neck.

Both of Karen's hands were still outstretched in the same position, her not knowing what to do with the blood that stained her palms. Frank looked down at her, after spending a moment comforting his son, and reached a hand out to her to help her up. “Thanks for helping him, you really didn’t have to do that.” The moment their hands met he seemed to become aware of the blood that covered Karen's. “I think all three of us should go inside to wash up. Sound good, Buddy?” Frank directed to his son. 

Junior nodded halfheartedly into his father's shoulder.

Karen followed the two inside of their apartment, still not having said anything. She took a moment to look around the small living room area. It was set up the same way as her apartment except there were things covering the floor, and more furniture had been brought in. She followed Frank as he walked into the kitchen area and set Junior on the counter next to the sink. She smiled at the plastic kiddie bowls that filled the sink and the artwork and good quiz grades that were hung on the fridge. It reminded her of when she was a kid.

Frank dampened a paper towel and started to wipe Juniors face off, much to Juniors protests. Frank looked over at Karen who seemed to be zoned out. “You can wash your hands if you like, ma’am. Thanks again for sitting with Junior.”

Karen quickly snapped out of whatever memory she was lost in and tried to smile. “Thank you, and really it was no problem. I wasn’t going to just leave him there.”

“You never know nowadays. Most people in this city have bigger and better things to worry about. People always going on to the next thing,” Frank said. Karen couldn’t help but notice the slightly bitter tone. 

“Well good thing I’m in no rush,” Karen smiled.

“Yeah,” he nodded “good thing.”

She dried her hands off on a kitchen towel that was on the counter and stood a bit awkwardly as Frank washed his hands quickly and disposed of the paper towel.

He reached out and ruffled his son’s hair, “Now what do we say to Ms. Page, Junior?”

Junior looked up at Karen with red rimmed eyes and seemed as though he was about to say something until he looked back over at his father.

“He means to say, ‘Thank you, Ms. Page’.” Lisa spoke up from the doorway.

“Let your brother say it,” Frank insisted, as though this happens all the time.

“It’s fine,” Karen said quickly, “Really it’s no big deal. I’m glad you’re feeling better Junior.”

Junior smiled slightly and looked down at his feet. 

There was a moment of silence until Karen shifted awkwardly on her feet and fiddled with her hands. Frank realised she was uncomfortable and immediately said, “Here Ms. Page, let me walk you out.”

Karen waved a goodbye to both children and followed Frank back to the hallway. She had to step over a few toys that littered the floor as he apologized for the mess, but she just waved it off. 

Frank stopped in his doorway as Karen walked back into the hall to grab her purse, which, amazingly, had not been stolen. “Thanks again, ma’am. I hope we didn’t make you late for anything.”

“Like I said, I’m in no rush. Even with this I’ll probably still be early. First day jitters and all that, makes you actually get up early for once,” she joked.  
Frank smiled. “I get it. Where are you working?”

“Um, it’s a new law firm, Nelson and Murdock, “ Karen explained. “I’m just a secretary though. An old friend of mine, the Nelson in Nelson and Murdock, he hired me last minute to help out. It’s just the three of us right now so it’s just a small thing, but I’m really glad for the opportunity.”

“Well good for you, congratulations. I hope everything goes well today.” Frank said.

“Thanks,” she said as she tucked a piece of hair behind her ear. “Have a nice day, Frank.”

“You too, Ms. Page,” he waved slightly before he closed the door leaving Karen standing alone in the hallway.

She flattened out her pencil skirt and tried to wipe the smile off of her face that Frank left there. He has children, she thought to herself, that means he’s probably married. Karen Page will not let herself be attracted to a married man. She kept telling herself this as she walked the streets of Hell’s Kitchen. She was not going to start her brand new life by developing a crush on her neighbor. Still though, there was one thought in the back of her head that kept that stupid smile on her face.

Frank Castle was the only person to congratulate her on her new job.


End file.
